Day 3 - Metta Meditation

There is so much to say about Metta Meditation, but its difficult to squeeze it all into 5 minutes without causing a total overload.

So I'd like to begin by explaining what Metta means. Its usually translated as loving-kindness. But we could also think of it as benevolence, unconditional friendliness, or goodwill. The exact word is not as important as understanding that the practice of Metta is working to cultivate a warm quality of the heart. A caring attitude, a way of being in which we can show up in the world for other people. Because we don’t only meditate for ourselves. The popular saying “what you put in is what you get back” is a true-ism, so in the end it all comes back anyway.

Everyone wants the same thing: to be happy, to be safe, to be healthy, to live with ease. Perhaps it seems a bit selfish that we always begin Metta meditation by wishing happiness for our self first. But think of it like putting your own oxygen mask on in an aeroplane before helping other people.

Therefore, once you’ve wished yourself Metta, loving-kindess or unconditional friendship, only then do you send out goodwill to someone close to you, someone you love. Then to someone you feel neutral about. (That could be your local barista or someone at the till in a shop.) After that - probably the most difficult part of Metta meditation - we send out Metta, lovingkindness or goodwill to someone we dislike. Tricky, that one. It’s not always so easy, especially the first time you try it.

But I invite you to really stay with this practice because it’s a very powerful tool for transformation. I will never forget the first time I practiced this part of Metta meditation. Afterwards, I never saw the person I disliked in the same negative light again. And even more amazing: when we drop our dislike, we feel easier, lighter, better about ourselves.

It reminds me of the well known saying attributed to Nelson Mandela:

Keeping resentments is like “swallowing poison and expecting the other person to die.”

Finally, the last stage of the practice is wishing happiness and send Metta to every person in the world.

So you see, although it's about wishing other people well, a regular Metta practice will also spill over into our own life, into our meditation practice, by bringing in a more gentle approach to our own experiences, our own emotions, our thoughts, and helps us to be gently with our wandering mind during meditation. It also creates a calm centre, which is what meditation is about.