Don't Kill, Don't Steal and Watch What You Say – Skillful Minds Create Skillful Words.

There is something fundamental to our practice called the 'Eightfold Path', which is a set of guidelines to help us navigate and ease our way. They are right view, right motivation, right speech, right action, right livelihood, right effort, right mindfulness, and right concentration. Today we're touching on right speech.

You might be surprised by the emphasis placed on the practice of skillful speech. Our teachings talk seriously about how we use our capacity to speak. Right speech is considered of such great importance that it not only forms part of the Eightfold Path, but is also found alongside some heavy-weight vows or ethical commitments we make such as don't kill and don't steal. Why is what we say so important? Because our words have a huge impact on people around us, as well as ourselves. The words we use have the ability to create an environment of peace and happiness. Or not. Words are a gift to ourselves and others.

Right speech. I prefer to use the words 'skillful' or 'intentional speech' because right implies a polarity of right and wrong, and we try to steer away from opposites. Often right speech is simply interpreted as not lying or telling the truth. But what is the truth? The more correct translation of samma vaca is 'well chosen speech'. Which includes not being rude, arrogant or mean, not to criticize or gossip, not talking behind people's back. It is about being skillful in our speech: how to be polite, respectful, when to speak, when not to speak. But it's also more than simply biting our tongue so as not to say the wrong thing. We should examine our intention. Intentional speech is being conscious of the words we’re using and why. If we are aware of our intention before we speak, and express ourselves truthfully and with kindness, we can expect to create compassionate understanding. The old teachings say right speech is: "...spoken at the right time. It is spoken in truth. It is spoken affectionately. It is spoken beneficially. It is spoken with a mind of good-will." In other words, sincere, truthful, kind words. There's a well-known phrase which describes it well: "if it's not true, necessary or kind, don't say it"

When we think of right speech we are conscious of the words we use to talk to others. But equally important is how we talk to our self. We should be as mindful about the words we use, using words which are true and beneficial. We deserve our kindness, affection and good-will as much as anyone. And using right speech in our 'self talk' is as important as skillful words used in conversation with others.

'I can't', 'I should', or 'I have to' are examples of unconscious speech towards ourselves. When we use those how mindful or aware are we? What’s our intention there? What is driving us? Is there compassion? Are those words true, necessary or kind? What happens if we flip it upside down and consider or say 'I can' or 'it's not necessary, I don't have to...'?

I read a few lovely phrases about the idea of right speech:

" Mastering our minds begins with mastering our mouths."

"Skillful minds create skillful words."

"Kindness is a skillful way of adjusting our thoughts, words and actions."

"The way we talk to ourself is one of the few things we can control in life. There’s no reason to be anything but kind to ourself and others in words and actions."

Or, as the 14th Dalai Lama famously said: "Be kind whenever possible. It is always possible."

Metta

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